Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Finding The Love You Need In Places You Never Looked

I think, that for a lot of us, God has been portrayed as a Zeus sort of figure- up on this pedestal in the sky, a million miles above earth, with his thunderbolt in one hand, and a finger pointing at us from the other- bellowing "tsk tsk tsk" at our lives. And if we buy this image, of the father standing in fierce judgement of his children, then we don't get to experience his grace. We are waiting to be something we aren't...a better version of ourselves...without the cursing and the breakdowns and the doubts and the humanness, before we stand before God and receive what he has to offer. I wonder, though, if we were created in the image of God, then maybe his love comes to us in a more recognizable form.

I sat with a group of women, this morning, over coffee, and felt an amazing shower of healing washing over me- this unconditional acceptance of the Judy that was before them: me and my self-deprecating humor, flawed figure, just-got-out-of-bed face...you know the girl I'm talking about. And this is where God meets me- two inches from my face, with the grit and the grime and the "come as you are arms" held out before me- And he says, through the support and encouragement and loving eyes of these amazing friends- "you are my child and I knew you before you were born and you are good...With you I am well pleased."

I believe that we are vessels of our creator and that through our imperfection we are perfectly able to bring love to those who need it most, who sit before us, in the most mundane of ways.

Today I am grateful for the women in my life who cheer me on as I trod paths filled with stones and roots and weeds. I am grateful for the souls who take for granted the way they bring me into their presence and sustain my spirit with laughter and offer me the chance to forgive myself for every minute that I am less than what I could be.

From the depths of my "purse"- I love you all.

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About Me

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Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, United States
Forty-three year-old, mother and staunch advocate of four young children, passionate warrior of truth and self, finding the soul in each day, sharing my struggles and triumphs as I live them. Mostly I do this for me, so my thoughts don't race as much at night as they used to. But I also give this to those of you who need to know, in any or every way, that you are not alone.

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