Monday, March 16, 2009

Loss

Shawndra passed away yesterday afternoon, as did my cousin Gary, both from cancer. Sometimes it seems to me that this incidious disease is taking everyone...

Tom has continued to soak in the time he got to spend in splendor with his children last week and is pondering a life over-haul as a result. These moments of his, where he has radical visions for our future, cause me to sit up straight and really listen because they are few but significant. He spent several hours with me on Saturday talking of the value of holding Liam's hand for days, through the paths of Disney World, and how he doesn't want these moments to slip away due to a rat-race life and a living guided solely on financial stability/success. He loves his children like no other and I know that every word he pronounces on these grounds is precious and comes from days of soul-searching known only unto him.

Life is short and unpredictable. I treasure that we have lived our lives thus far with great passion and fervor and I feel priveleged to be married to a man who is committed to savoring the souls of his offspring rather than the tangibles of what a wealthier lifestyle could provide.

The reality of loss leads me to reexamine my priorities and I am here, yet again, wondering if my time and energy is being spent in ways that are worthy of what matters most...

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Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, United States
Forty-three year-old, mother and staunch advocate of four young children, passionate warrior of truth and self, finding the soul in each day, sharing my struggles and triumphs as I live them. Mostly I do this for me, so my thoughts don't race as much at night as they used to. But I also give this to those of you who need to know, in any or every way, that you are not alone.

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