Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Fuzzy Parenting

I savor the one-on-one time that I get to spend with each of my children. It isn't as frequent as I (or they) would like but when I'm able to carve some time out of my days, and I have help with my other kids, it feels delicious! Today, Lily asked to get some fabric to sew a big pillow for her bed, so after I got Seth down for a nap, she and I traveled to JoAnn's to examine the latest in textile offerings. We wandered the store and took our time, finally settling on some lavender tie-dye fleece and purple heart-print calico cotton. After we got home, I took Benjamin swimming, leaving Lily to her needle and thread with Liza, our teen aged summer helper (who is a red-head and has been said to "fit right in" with the Sombar clan). Back in the late winter/early spring, during his lessons with his friend Trevor, Ben was extremely apprehensive about the water and refused to leave the comforts of the "box" (a semi-shallow area of the pool at our gym). Now my super-duper five-year-old can swim many yards, with gusto, heading toward the deep-end. We played diving games and nuzzled each other with chlorine-essence kisses for about 2 hours before he got a cramp in his rib cage and we decided to head home. Liam and I will have our turn later on (he got to go school-supply shopping with my parents today, by himself, instead).

The lack of individual attention that siblings receive can certainly be considered a draw-back to having a large family (if you want to call four kids "large"), but, as an only-child, I have always felt that the benefits of the sister/brother bond far outweigh any deficit of one-on-one time a kid might have. Striking a balance is the tight-rope we moms of multiples walk, and sometimes it feels like a constant struggle between guilt and contentment. Today was a gift where I got to hone-in on the uniqueness of each of my children- and I love them so.

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Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, United States
Forty-three year-old, mother and staunch advocate of four young children, passionate warrior of truth and self, finding the soul in each day, sharing my struggles and triumphs as I live them. Mostly I do this for me, so my thoughts don't race as much at night as they used to. But I also give this to those of you who need to know, in any or every way, that you are not alone.

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